I’ve not been having the greatest day — just feeling very hormonal and restless.
But earlier today, as we chilled on the couch together and I whined about how none of our potential New Year’s Eve plans sounded interesting, Chris said, “Well, we could just stay home and relax tonight.”
Of course, I whined, “Every year it’s just you and I, it’s boring.”
And he answered, quietly, with a smile: “Next year it won’t be.”
2009 is going to be surreal…
Maia remains, thankfully, head-down, although she likes to swing from side to side whenever she feels like it. It is always a surprise to feel little kicky hands and feet on the right side of my abdomen when the day before she was on the left! She gets hiccups all the time too, including nearly every night when I go to sleep; yesterday her hiccups were so strong that it felt like I was doing Kegels or something, even though I wasn’t.
I’m measuring 33.5cm at 33 weeks and 1 day, which puts me just about the 50th percentile — pretty much the same place I’ve been all along, except for a growth spurt somewhere around week 29, I think. Georgia says the baby feels like she is a “good, normal” size, “definitely not large”, which makes me quite happy to hear. We talked a bit about breastfeeding and labour, since those are the things that’re most on my mind lately, and Georgia kept saying, “It’s alright, you can do it.” Do women doubt themselves a lot? Maybe I am cocky, but I don’t have any fear of being unable to do either of those things; I just want to make sure I’m as prepared as I can be. I still haven’t convinced myself to go take pre-natal classes — I’ll admit that the two main reasons are money and Chris’ schedule; I can’t justify dragging him out of the house to help me “learn to breathe” for a few hours after he’s worked a 12 hour day, when I don’t really feel like breathing patterns would be helpful to me. I mean, obviously, I don’t know anything about all this, but I think that I can be strong enough to get through labour and focused enough to keep myself sane without learning how to breathe.
Hopefully I am do not end up smacking myself for making that decision!
I’m feeling pretty great, honestly. I mean, getting to sleep isn’t always the most comfortable thing in the world, and my sciatica-type hip/thigh cramps have returned after subsiding last week, so it’s pretty painful to try and turn over in the middle of the night. Still, even though I wake up every 2-3 hours to go pee, I feel like the sleep I’m getting is really good. I always wake up feeling refreshed and like I got enough rest.
New this week, though, is a pelvic soreness/achiness. When I’ve been sitting for awhile and then stand up, I have to lift myself up evenly (not lean my weight to one or the other) and very slowly or else my entire pelvic area just aches and aches for the first few steps I take. I imagine this is something that will get worse before it gets better.
Also, anytime I have to get up from a reclining position, I feel like a turtle that’s been left on its back 😦
Still, I’m happy, she’s wiggly, and best of all, Chris is getting more and more affectionate. I feel like he’s really, really ready for this whole pregnancy thing to be over so he can meet, hold, and kiss his little girl, which pretty much makes me melt!
We are singers in my household. Not in the traditional sense that we sing along with the radio, but in a strange sort of embarrassing thank-god-I-found-someone-that-puts-up-with-me way — we make up ditties about anything. Preferably ones with really strained rhymes and made-up words.
You know, like the one Chris sang to my belly tonight:
Maia Papaya / Likes to fry-a / FISHIES!
And then he tickled me until both of his girls were kicking.
I so love this man.
While Chris’ schedule — one week on, one week off — is awesome in that it gives us tons of time together, plenty of opportunities for vacations, and will mean he gets to see lots of his little girl, it’s terrible in that it is completely inflexible. When he is scheduled to work, he is scheduled to work, period. In emergency situations, or in the case of his upcoming paternity leave, a substitute can be found — but it’s not like he can request his birthday off or whatnot. Or mine, which is coming up on January 5th.
This year, he worked on Christmas. Because there are an even number of weeks in a year, next year he will also be working Christmas. Now admittedly, on Christmas he just had to go in for 20 minutes to leave his phone number on the desk and make sure that the one driver he had on the road was alright, so I’m not worried about that — it’s the fact that he’s working that week, and that means we can’t plan to be with my family for the holidays. I haven’t celebrated Christmas with my family for five years, and I fucking miss it.
So I pulled out the 2009 calendar and started marking every other week “W” for work, to see his schedule. He works Christmas, as anticipated; he also works both Canadian and American Thanksgiving. What the fuck? I know there are plenty of other weeks during the year that we can go see my family, and we were talking just yesterday about how we plan to squeeze in two visits to see them in Connecticut a year, but it’s still really frustrating to know we won’t get to see them for the holidays.
I guess when Maia is more cognizant of things, we will have to get webcams and Skype set up so she can see and chat with my side of the family anytime they want!
This is her take from Christmas… and she’s still like -7 weeks old!
Receiving blankets, a new jacket, some onesies & baby sacks, a teddy bear, a Babies R Us gift card, a mesh pacifier thingie for me to put food in and let her chow down without choking, an boppy pillow, crib bedding, a camel picture & half of my art project.
A close-up of the camel picture, because I think it’s so cool that it’s almost painful:
Seriously, what kinda kid wouldn’t want that awesome camel hanging on their bedroom wall?
The first four of eight prints that I’m matting & attaching ribbon to today. You know, those prints that I said I was going to do like two months ago. Well, I’m counting them as a Christmas gift, cause I worked my butt off on these today! (Who knew it was so hard to cut along a line?)
Maia got way more presents this year than anybody else — which is good, because that’s what we wanted! And we finally have a bedding set for the crib that I will set up and take some pictures of tomorrow.
Chris and I also got some nice gifts, but this one (from my Mom) is my favourite:
The website that created it is calliopedesigns.com and I am just so, so delighted with how freaking adorable it is.
I hope everyone else’s holidays have been filled with family and joy, just as ours have.
Up to Week 6: I’M NOT PREGNANT, THOSE ARE PERIOD CRAMPS AND IT WILL COME ANY DAY NOW.
Weeks 7 to Week 14: Okay, are you ever going to grow? Hello? Is there even a baby in there or is this some cruel joke?
Weeks 15 to Week 20: My MINISCULE bump is the greatest. thing. ever. Just look at it! I am clearly pregnant! Everyone can see it……. can’t they?
Weeks 21 to 29: Holy fuck, my belly is expanding exponentially and I can’t move I can’t breathe I can’t roll over oh my God how is it even going to get any bigger?
Weeks 30 to present: Wait, I don’t think it’s big enough. How on earth is a person, a viable human being, that small? Is she cramped in there? Is she tired of not having as much room to kick me? No matter what angle I look at it from, it just doesn’t seem as big as I think it should be…
Also, pure hilarity: laughing with my belly exposed. My belly button juts out ALL THE WAY (if it isn’t already, which depends on how Maia is positioned) and my entire belly quivers back and forth like Jell-o. Then I start laughing even harder because it looks so preposterous, and Chris teases me between his own bouts of laughter… good times.
PS: Happy 22nd, Aunt-to-be Katie! We love you & wish we could be there to celebrate with you. And hey, Mom? Thanks for making her so perfectly 🙂
Honestly, I hadn’t noticed any swelling of my body due to water retention yet during this pregnancy. Then today, I was about to do dishes… and could NOT get my rings off. They just were not budging. So I ran my hand under cold water until I could finally finagle the rings off.
I’m kinda sad about this, actually. I mean, I’m wearing them on my left pinky finger instead, but it feels reeeeeeeally odd. Here’s a pic of my swollen hands:
I keep waiting for the “nesting” urge to take over. So far, my sink continues to fill with dishes — honest to God, does it ever end? Is the sink ever going to be empty again? Laundry is still strewn across the bedroom floor. The tables are still fluttered with stuff — you know, newspapers, coupons from the Welcome Wagon, more dishes, a box of cookies, unopened junk mail. The bed doesn’t get made every day, so Chris bemoans the twisted state of the blankets whenever he gets into bed (okay, I really do leave them a total mess, because I find few things more comforting than hugging them like a big, fluffy body pillow). I haven’t replaced the Vanity Fair on top of the toilet in two months, because the most recent one is somewhere on one of the tables. We’ve got two boxes that need unpacking and nowhere to unpack them. Shoes are starting to tiptoe out of the coat closet, because goddammit, my winter boots kept finding their way into the far back corner and I just can’t bend that far.
But the nursery?
The nursery is spotless. I dust and sweep in there regularly. All the newborn-sized clothes is folded and tucked into the top drawer of her dresser, while the other things are hung up by size. I haven’t done the picture art project yet (whoops!) or managed to get the sticky price tag residue off the glass piece I bought (nail polish remover?), nor have I printed out all the family pics Chris has been begging me to do for two months now for the frames that we bought to decorate our living room.
Maybe I’m just fucking lazy, and using this “I don’t have the nesting instinct” thing as a cop-out. I think this is the most realistic explanation.